Failed First Dates: The Weeble

ex-baseball player
awesome coldplay concert date
dishonest weeble

I don’t usually get really excited about meeting guys for first dates, more often than not interest I thought I had over the phone is dissipated quickly in person and I find physical attraction impossible to gauge in advance. But this one guy… I really thought I had something. I was thinking if the date went well, I’d probably be headed straight into a relationship.

He picked me up at my place and we drove together to the concert, stopping first at my bank for cash and then at his. As I sat in the car, watching him head over to the ATM, I noticed his lower half was really, really big. As in wide, disproportionately so to his upper half.

At first I was confused. He had given me the impression he was very active - running and biking regularly - and with a previous history of competitive baseball through college. That seemed to be not possible of the man I was with. He was literally too wide to fit comfortably into the concert seats and he sort of waddled when he walked.

I’m not looking for physical perfection, but I am looking for someone with a similar activity level and general physique as me. I’m also looking for someone who is honest, and as the date went on I felt more and more that I’d been deceived.

Nicknaming him the Weeble isn’t nice, of course, but it’s the only way I could think of to describe his shape when trying to explain to my friends how different his appearance was than expected. I probably shouldn’t have started out with my hopes so high, I’m sure it’s the reason I felt so crushed afterwards.

Weebles wobble but they don’t get second dates.