Oh No He Didn't!

Sunday, October 31, 2010
In the end I went with drunk texting as the mechanism for ending things with Summer Boy. I had started with a simple email on Sunday stating that I thought that whatever was happening between us had run its course. I was too riled up to blow him off entirely, but I thought I’d “take the high road” by ignoring the questionable timing of the CraigsList posts entirely.

Of course I didn’t hear anything back from my email, so Monday when I got home from work I hopped right onto CL to see if he had posted anything. He had, that bastard.

There he was, with his stupid same picture he always used, looking to see if anyone wanted to go to the open mic comedy night at this bar by his place. An exact date he had suggested he and I go on a few weeks earlier (but never followed through with).

Oh how he was hurting my pride! Oh how I wanted to scream and shout and stomp! Oh how I should not have had so much sangria!

The text messaging that ensued next was not my finest moment in breakups but it did help me get a much clearer perspective on Summer Boy and how detached from the reality of our situation he seemed to be.

Me: I would have gone to the comedy show with you! But I hope you found a new friend.
Him: Well... I would have asked but as you put it 'things have run their course'.
Him: But just so you know... I am at the comedy show by myself.

Right. He hadn’t mentioned getting together on Monday as late as Sunday evening when I sent him my “it’s over” email but I’m sure he would have. Eventually.

Me: Look, the timing of your posts makes you seem shady. Or like I’m your last resort. Which is fine, just a bummer for me. Plus I am looking for someone a bit more available. So it seemed like a good time to stop trying to see you, and find someone who was more into me.
Him: Well... I can tell you I am not seeing other people and up until the email I got from you I was going to see if you wanted to join but next thing I knew I was being stonewalled.

Stonewalled? I sent one email saying I thought things were over. It's not like I'd been refusing to talk to him about it.

Me: Then why all the CL posts? I would have believed you b/f I saw them. Seems you are looking for someone else. I didn't like the feeling so I thought I would cut out.
Him: Posted and then never really read the responses... just deleted them.

Liar, liar, pants on fire. Practically the only reason to post on CL is to read the ridiculous responses!

Him: And you tried to make me feel bad for posting yet... seems like you were checking…
Me: Please. I only just saw them. I was out there b/c it seemed things weren't going anywhere with you.
Him: Funny... same reason I was out there... hmmmm
Me: Bullshit. I try to see you all the time.

Is it me, or has his whole defense been to blame me? I’m being shady because I’m out on CraigsList reading his posts? The ones he posted while he was texting me about being somewhere else after turning down my suggestion to do something that same night?

It also did not go unnoticed that he flat out ignored my accusation that he had lied the prior Friday (in texts not re-printed), which only made it seem more likely that it was true. And I’m not sure what he thought he would gain by constantly pointing out that he wasn’t seeing other people. We were ALLOWED to see other people. We had a NO STRINGS ATTACHED relationship.

It was stupid, initiating a texting war while angry and tipsy. It was childish, him throwing back all my questions instead of simply answering them. And it was infuriating, he had completely missed my point, which was that he wasn’t interested in spending time with me, which, by all accounts, he wasn’t.

It was useful, though, because it gave me what I needed. It was over.


Anonymous said...

What an asshole.

jo said...

i wanna slap him for you. grr men... i'm glad you're done and over. he's a jerk.

Dater at Large said...

He is a jerk! And I am a cool lady! Eh, it's okay. I'll find someone better.