It's All Coming Back to Me Now

Monday, November 29, 2010
I remember what happened with Marathon Guy last year. I kept inviting him to do things and he kept declining without reciprocating invites. I felt like he just wasn’t that interested in me, especially since at first he seemed perfectly capable of suggesting we get together.

I remember now because the exact same thing is happening. Ever since I got back from being out of town (shortly after he had been out of town) we haven't hung out as much. And when we have it’s always been at my suggestion. There’s a ton of texting and emailing, but he hasn't made any real advances. So now I’m right back where I was before, thinking he isn't really into me. Again.

Come to think of it, maybe my hesitation at inviting him to future events, or events with friends, is less about being freaked out about taking some kind of step in our relationship and more about good old fashioned fear of rejection. I have a decent amount of self-confidence, but eventually you gotta stop banging your head against the wall. For the record, my Bears game invite for two weeks out has already been declined, because of a race he’s doing earlier that day. Which wouldn’t actually overlap with game time; he could definitely do both if he wanted to.

Huh. What do I do now?

I know what I did last time; I just stopped inviting him to things. I think I still replied to his text messages, but those stopped pretty quickly. Within a week or two it was all over. This time around our communication is regular and ongoing, despite the fact that he’s completely stopped pushing to meet in person. So that won’t work.

I do remember him saying something before about having thought that I wasn’t interested in him, that he’d stopped pursuing me as a result of that. I’m not sure what else I can do to convince him of my interest though.

I shouldn’t have to, either. If he wanted to spend time with me, he would. Right?


Sam said...

I'm sorry to say this, but your instincts are probably right. You should have a guy who wants to be with you, a lot.

Lifebeginsat30ty said...

I think the only way you're going to know is to ask him! But yeah, if someone wants to hang out with you they will.

Kitty Moore said...

I agree with the wise lady above. Just come right out and ask him!

Dater at Large said...

Ugh,I hate actually putting things out there like that. I much prefer to ignore things until it becomes clear to any and all parties where things stand.

Yes, I know that decreases the chances things will end up the way I want them to. But maybe I can work up to it... after cocktails... :)

Dater at Large said...

Kitty, I've missed you! Looking forward to reading your latest...