Failed First Dates: Mr. Emotional

pizza place owner
needy and emotional
stop smothering me

In one of my last CL posts I met this guy who I decided to take a chance on despite a few mixed signals. On one hand, he seemed like the motivated, confident guy I normally am attracted to. On the other, he was clearly a workaholic and admittedly was in the process of losing 100 pounds. In the plus column, our conversations were good and he was serious about going out on actual dates. Then again, he was way over the top emotionally, sending me text messages in the morning that said “miss u” and “thought about you when I woke up”.

Before we even scheduled our first date he started exhibiting this unbelievably unattractive quality of feeling neglected or accusing me of losing interest since I hadn’t replied to his one line emails within say 4 hours. I tried to explain to him that I don’t ramp up that quickly in relationships; that while I enjoyed talking to him I wasn’t ready to talk to him every day, let alone throughout the day (and PS we hadn't even met each other yet!).

We got as far as scheduling a date for the following Thursday. We had last talked on a Monday night and while I wasn’t particularly excited about the date I woke up on Thursday morning determined to have a good time. I planned to email him when I got into the office - we had already finalized the plans earlier - to confirm and sound excited. I had an email from him sitting in my inbox, from Wednesday night, stating that since he hadn’t heard from me (in approx 48-hrs) that I clearly wasn’t interested and so the date was off.

We exchanged a few emails back and forth, in which I said I was sorry he had come to that decision but was fine with it, and in which he then re-instated the date request and tried to get me to agree to go out with him after he had just canceled on me.

Enough is enough, though, so I had to cut him loose. It’s a shame, too, I love pizza.