He Likes Me... He Likes Me Not...

Wednesday, July 1, 2009
I recently stopped being one of those girls that came up with hundreds of reasons why guys didn’t call me. Now I just believe guys who like you, call you. Or email, or text message, etc. I also believe guys who like you ask you out. It seems pretty straightforward so this is obviously where I get into trouble.

Take this guy I recently met online. After a few emails we talk on the phone, but I think I’m talking too much, rambling and being uninteresting. I must do something right, because he suggests we get together sometime and I agree that we should. No actual plans are made, though, and our conversation ends when he abruptly says he’s heading to bed.

My gut says, he’s not interested, suggestion to get together without any invite details (when, where, what) is usually a courtesy phrase, like when you run into someone you used to be friends with and on parting say "we should get together sometime". You both nod, knowing you’ll never call each other.

I’m feeling adventurous, though, so as my weekend is winding down on Sunday I call him to see if he’s free for sushi. I leave a voicemail and don’t hear back until a few days later, but he seems friendly and throws out drinks on Friday. Maybe I had it wrong, he does seem interested.

I’m not available on the Friday, though, so I counter with Wednesday. He’s not available and we exchange a few emails that end with me asking whether he wants to pick a date to grab drinks next week. I hear back nothing for ten days (including two weekends). Not interested.

But then out of nowhere, he sends an email saying he hadn’t heard back from me… did I still want to get together? Interested, albeit inaccurate as I had emailed last.

I reply back promptly that yes, I am interested. What did he have in mind? Two days later he responds asking what I was doing over the weekend and that he was thinking Sat or Sun. Now I’m confused. Not interested?

My trusty guy work friend says he might be trying to avoid all the scheduling issues we’ve been experiencing by being the most flexible dude ever. I think this sounds ridiculous, asking someone out on a date should involve coming up with the details. Nevertheless I reply with what I hope sounds positive, saying that Saturday would work and what should we do?

Two days later, mid-Friday, I still haven’t heard back. Not interested, definitely, and this time, I’m talking about me.